Want to Improve Your Relationships? Drop Out of More Groups


Here’s the problem with networking these days: we’re all stretched too thin.

There are too many opportunities for networking. Not too few. It’s hard to know where to spend your time.

So here’s my solution: drop out of more groups.

That’s right, I said it: drop out of more groups. (You have my permission, for what that’s worth.)

The problem today is it’s too easy to join groups, so many of us join too many.

It’s too easy – we can all join dozens of LinkedIn and Facebook groups with a few clicks of the mouse. There are new tools for networking online created each day that make it easier and easier.

We’re left with a false sense that we’re doing something to “network” when in fact it does nothing. Zilch.

I advocate minimizing the number of groups and activities you are involved in, but going much deeper with the chosen few you decide to target.

I’m probably going to take some flak for this opinion.

But if your goal is to get better at networking, what you need to do is FOCUS and CONCENTRATE your efforts.

I know it’s kind of counter-intuitive.

You’ll find your focused efforts to target a few specific groups will result in a much better returns.

Here’s how you do it:

  • First, pick the 3-5 groups which are really targeted and highly focused for your career or business goals. (Read more about the Conversation list strategy here.)
  • Second, find out how you can deepen your involvement with these groups. See if you can join the board, or at least a subcommittee. Organize an event. Offer to speak to the group.
  • Third, eliminate your involvement in other groups you belong to which are not aligned with your career or business goals. Drop off their mailing lists. Don’t go to any more of their in-person events. Stop paying dues. Stop attending conferences.
  • Fourth, use a “Results and Revenue” worksheet (something I talk about in Power Networking) to monitor the results of your deeper involvement in these groups.
  • Finally, after 12 months, make any changes necessary. You may need to drop out of certain unproductive groups and join others.

If you haven’t labeled me a heretic yet (or at least stopped reading), then I think you’ll agree that taking these steps will really help your networking efforts.